Put down the finger


The adventures of Aussie Sharon, on a working holiday in Britain ...

Today Sharon has some casual work as a teller for a well-known bank in London. She is serving customers when a man with a long beard and religious dress enters. He waits patiently in the queue until served.

Sharon: May I help you?

Man: [raises finger and whispers] Give me all your money.

Sharon: [pauses, then pretends to raise her hands in shock] Wooo! Don't hurt me Mr Sheik. I'll do whatever you say ... ha, ha, good one. Now, what will it be, deposit or withdrawal?

[eyes widen] Give me all your money! Now!

Sharon: OK, mate. Very funny, now how I can help you?

[shouts and waves finger] I warn you! I will use it!

Sharon: Look mate, get your hand off it, I ain't got all day to play silly buggers - now what's it gonna be?

Polly: [madly pressing alarm button, walks from next window] Shaz, he's got a finger, do what he says!

Sharon: As if! Tell him he's dreamin. Tell him to stick his finger where the sun don't shine.

Polly: Do you live on an island or something? If he starts preaching hate with that finger people will die! Haven't you heard the polls?

Muslim Britain split over 'martyrs' of 7/7

13% of British Muslims think that the four men who carried out the London Tube and bus bombings of July 7, 2005, should be regarded as “martyrs”

7% agree that suicide attacks on civilians in the UK can be justified in some circumstances

2% would be proud if a family member decided to join al-Qaeda

Polly: If he starts preaching hate, those numbers will go up and people will die. Give him the money!

One in four Muslims sympathises with motives of terrorists

... six per cent insist that the bombings were ... fully justified. Six per cent may seem a small proportion but in absolute numbers it amounts to about 100,000 individuals who, if not prepared to carry out terrorist acts, are ready to support those who do.

the proportion ... who ... have some sympathy with the feelings and motives of those who carried them out is considerably larger - 24 per cent.

A substantial majority, 56 per cent, say that, whether or not they sympathise with the bombers, they can at least understand why some people might want to behave in this way.

Man: [turns to crowd] You know, I don't care much for this English weather - it's awfully cold, don't you think?

Crowd: [gasps in horror. Presses back against wall. All except a little girl]

Girl: I feel the cold too. The mornings are bitterly hard. [walks to man, transfixed]

Polly: Stop it! I'm packing the money!

Man: And you know, I don't care much for David Beckham. In fact, you might say I hate him!

Crowd: [screams in horror. All except a little boy]

Boy: I never liked him after he left Manchester United. [raises finger] I hate him too! I hate him! [walks to man, transfixed]

Polly: [to Sharon] Look what you've done! He's got two haters already!! Start packing money you idiot!! Mi5 can't cope as it is ...

Too many terrorist plots to name, say Mi5

Mi5 is now tracking so many suspected terrorists that it has run out of codenames for them.

... officers are aware of more than 1,600 people in Britain who could pose a terrorist threat, and fear that up to 30 credible terrorist plots are under way ...

Tony Blair ... said: "We need to combat the poisonous propaganda of those people that warps and perverts the minds of younger people."

4,000 suspected jihadists in UK

Up to 4,000 terrorism suspects and their supporters are active in Britain, the former Metropolitan Police Commissioner Lord Stevens said yesterday ...

Lord Stevens said the security service MI5 had recently suggested a figure of 2,000 but the true number was "probably nearer 4,000".

Police and MI5 were "still too underfunded and undermanned to cope with the task they face in the decades to come ..."

Police: [on megaphone] This is the police! We have the place surrounded. There is no escape. Put the finger down and come out with your hands in your pockets.

Man: [shouts] I hate the police! I hate the government! I hate you all! I hate you! I hate you! [boy and girl join in shouting] I hate you! I hate you!

Police Sniper: I have the shot. Awaiting order.

Man: I hate Paris Hilton!


Police: Hold that shot ....

Man: I said "I hate Paris Hilton"!


Man: I hate the Supernanny! I hate the Osbournes!

Police: He's out of ammo! Go! Go! Go!

Senior figures in Australia's national security establishment believe the nation is on course to emulate Britain, where there are simply too many Islamic extremists for security services to monitor.

Is Australia on course to get held up by the finger?

Muslim Britain split over 'martyrs' of 7/7
One in four Muslims sympathises with motives of terrorists
Too many terrorist plots to name, say MI5
4,000 terror suspects in UK
Arrests just give us more to fear


  1. How right you are

    Britain today is Australia tomorrow.

  2. I saw a woman in the full burqua at my local shopping centre recently. It disturbed the hell out of me. How can you engage with a black potato sack. You can't. Just as you can't engage with a KKK.

    This was 21st century laid back, safe and friendly Australia. Not dark ages repressed backward muslim country. But that's where we are headed.